Elohim

Elohim puns in a nutshell

Like all gods, Elohim appears to have been created from poetry, by combining attributes that sound similar to his name. I assume that this was done in an honest fashion. Both Elohim and Yahweh probably existed before monotheism, as gods associated with their specific attributes. They were later merged, because several of their attributes are synonyms. For ELohim, the words all follow the pattern L-M, plus a letter He / Ḥet / ˀAleph / ˁAyin.

The spooks came later, found that some puns existed with nasty meanings, and used these specific gods for their pun-encryption.

• Elohim is a god, because אל ˀl El means “god”, and אלהים ˀlhym Elohim means “gods”. The same words are also used for “ruler” & “rulers”, all derived from the root meaning “strength”. -ym is the masculine plural suffix.
• Elohim is the foremost god, because אול ˀwl means “foremost”. אולים ˀwlym would be “the foremost ones”.
• Elohim is all-powerful, because אלם ˀlm means “power” & “strength” (spelled with ˀAleph).
• Elohim is all-powerful, because עלם ˁlm means “power” & “strength” (spelled with ˁAyin).
• Elohim is a wrathful god, because להם hlm means “striking”. (Yahweh puns with “punishment”.)
• But Elohim is also close to his people, because הלם hlm means “close” & “friend”. (Yahweh puns with “love”.)
• Elohim demands circumcision, perhaps because מהל mhl means “circumcision”.
• Elohim appears as a burning bush, perhaps because m-lhˀ means “burning”. (Yahweh also puns with “burning”.)
• Elohim appears as a burning bush, perhaps because hwlˀ means “wood”. (Yahweh also puns with “brushwood”.)
• Elohim leads people who live in tents and lives in a tent, because אהלים ˀhlym means “tents” & “tent people”. (Yahweh also puns with “tent”.)
• Elohim leads his people into wars, because לחם lḥm means “war”.
• Elohim demands showbread, because לחם lḥm also means “bread”.
• Elohim demands showbread, because לחם l-ḥm also means “for show”.
• Elohim guides his prophets through dreams, because חלם ḥlm means “dream” & “vision” (also “strength”).
• Elohim helps his people found a nation, because לאם lˀm means “people” & “nation”.
• Elohim is the creator of the world, because לאם ˁlm means “world”. (Yahweh puns with “creator”, so Yahweh Elohim would be the “creator of the world”).
• Elohim is the eternal god, because לאם ˁlm also means “eternal”.
• Elohim is generally hidden from direct sight most of the time, because לאם ˁlm also means “hidden”. The spooks also like this concept. (Yahweh also puns with “hidden”.)

Semitic El & Elohim for “gods” & “rulers”

The Semitic term אל ˀl El, plural אלהים ˀlhym Elohim, means “god” & “gods”, but also “lord” & “lords”. It is used for both gods & human lords. Equating gods & aristocrats was not uncommon in ancient pre-classical times: The Egyptian term Netjer was also used for both gods & high-level aristocrats.

Elohim as “rulers”

Elohim doesn’t merely mean “ruler”, but even “rulers”, in plural. This worked well in the old languages where rulers were gods anyway, but produced headaches for translators of later versions.

There’s one particularly odd sentence in Psalms 82:1:

• The actual meaning is: God stands among the mighty, and judges among the mighty.
• In Hebrew this reads: Elohim stands among the El, and judges among the Elohim. (The ancient spooks probably had some fun here.)
• KJV translates: God stands among the mighty, and judges among the gods. (Doesn’t fit too well with a monotheist paradigm.)
• NASB then translates: God stands among himself, and judges among the rulers.
• But either way, they have given a fine example that this strange word for “God” is actually a plural, meaning “gods” & “rulers”.

Just a few verses later in Psalms 82:6, even NASB translates as “gods”, yet gods who will “die like men”. So they’re beings with self-proclaimed god-like power, who’ll still die like men. I think we know that sort.

A Psalm of Asaph. God standeth in the congregation of the mighty; he judgeth among the gods.

KJV Psalms 82:1

A Psalm of Asaph. God takes His stand in His own congregation; He judges in the midst of the rulers.

NASB Psalms 82:1

mzmwr lˀsp ˀlhym nṣb bˁdt ˀl bqrb ˀlhym yšpṭ

מזמור לאסף אלהים נצב בעדת אל בקרב אלהים ישפט

TNK Psalms 82:1

I said, You are gods, And all of you are sons of the Most High.

NASB Psalms 82:6

I have said, Ye are gods; and all of you are children of the most High.

KJV Psalms 82:6

ˀny ˀmrty ˀlhym ˀtm wbny ˁlywn klkm

אני אמרתי אלהים אתם ובני עליון כלכם

TNK Psalms 82:6

Elohim as “judges”

There’s also a range of verses in Exodus 21, where translators couldn’t decide whether Elohim means “God” or “the rulers”. Here, KJV translated Elohim as “the judges”, NASB & ESV translate as “God”. Obviously, Elohim can mean both.

If the verses are encoded spook law, the original text was probably written ambiguous on purpose.

then his master shall bring him to God, then he shall bring him to the door or the doorpost. And his master shall pierce his ear with an awl; and he shall serve him permanently.

NASB Exodus 21:6

Then his master shall bring him unto the judges; he shall also bring him to the door, or unto the door post; and his master shall bore his ear through with an aul; and he shall serve him for ever.

TNK Exodus 21:6

whgyšw ˀdnyw ˀl hˀlhym whgyšw ˀl hdlt ˀw ˀl hmzwzh wrṣˁ ˀdnyw ˀt ˀznw bmrṣˁ wˁbdw lˁlm

והגישו אדניו אל האלהים והגישו אל הדלת או אל המזוזה ורצע אדניו את אזנו במרצע ועבדו לעלם

TNK Exodus 21:6

If the thief is not found, the owner of the house shall come near to God to show whether or not he has put his hand to his neighbor’s property.

ESV Exodus 22:8

If the thief is not caught, then the owner of the house shall appear before the judges, to determine whether he laid his hands on his neighbor’s property.

NASB Exodus 22:8

If the thief be not found, then the master of the house shall be brought unto the judges, to see whether he have put his hand unto his neighbour’s goods.

KJV Exodus 22:8

ˀm lˀ ymṣˀ hgnb wnqrb bˁl hbyt ˀl hˀlhym ˀm lˀ šlḥ ydw bmlˀkt rˁhw

אם לא ימצא הגנב ונקרב בעל הבית אל האלהים אם לא שלח ידו במלאכת רעהו

TNK Exodus 22:8

El & Elim as “rulers”

There are several Bible verses where human rulers are called El or Elim, which are variants of the same word root. For example, Nebuchadnezzar is called an El in Ezekiel 31:11, here written איל ˀyl.

I have therefore delivered him into the hand of the mighty one of the heathen; he shall surely deal with him: I have driven him out for his wickedness.

wˀtnhw byd ˀyl gwym ˁšw yˁšh lw kršˁw gršthw

ואתנהו ביד איל גוים עשו יעשה לו כרשעו גרשתהו

Ezekiel 31:11

Job 41:25 calls rulers Elim, which seems to be a “simple” form of Elohim.

When he raiseth up himself, the mighty are afraid: by reason of breakings they purify themselves.

mštw ygwrw ˀlym mšbrym ytḥṭˀw

משתו יגורו אלים משברים יתחטאו

Job 41:25

In the parallelism in Exodus 15:15, Edom’s rulers are called Alpha, Moab’s rulers are called Eli.

Then the dukes of Edom shall be amazed; the mighty men of Moab, trembling shall take hold upon them; all the inhabitants of Canaan shall melt away.

ˀz nbhlw ˀlwpy ˀdwm ˀyly mwˀb yˀḥzmw rˁd nmgw kl yšby knˁn

אז נבהלו אלופי אדום אילי מואב יאחזמו רעד נמגו כל ישבי כנען

Exodus 15:15