divine names

17 entries · click on a title to read the article

Typically, all attributes of a divinity are connected to that divinity’s name. This was likely a form of ancient poetry: People worshiped abstract concepts, and pictured them with words that were similar. Later, this system was corrupted and used for spook puns.

Amun

means “hidden” & “secret”

Athena

is a multi-pun with “intelligence”, “gazing” and similar words

Dagon

means “fish” & “cloaked”, and wears a fish cloak

Elohim

means “rulers”

Hathor

puns with “heavenly cow”, but also with “butchering rebels”

Horus

means “face”, but also “leader”

Ishtar

means “privities”, and is therefore nude

Min

is a dead guy with an erection, because he puns with “death” & “erected monument”

Osiris

puns with “power” & “wealth”

Poseidon

puns with pseudon, which means “falsehood”

Punny names of Egyptian gods

all have meanings that correspond to the animal heads

Punny names of Phoenician gods

all have nasty hidden meanings

Ra the Egyptian god

puns with “aristocracy”

Seth the Egyptian god

is evil, as he puns with “attacker”, “disorder”, “lead astray”

Tanit

is a tiny figurine and also a carnivore, because she puns with all her symbols

Thoth

puns with “downward”, “hidden”, “humiliation”, “instead of”

Yahweh

means “I am”, but also puns with “hidden”, and other attributes of Yahweh